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{{Hatnote|You may be looking for [[Wikipedia:Arguments to avoid in deletion discussions#Do not lose the information or the effort|Do not lose the information or the effort]] or for [[WP:YOULOSE]] on [[Wikipedia:Appeals to Jimbo]].}}
{{Civility essay}}
{{nutshell|Knowing how to "lose" a debate, with civility and grace, is sometimes as important as "winning" it.}}
[[File:Bundesarchiv Bild 183-R0731-0135, Montreal, XXI. Olympiade, Waldemar Cierpinski.jpg|thumb|right|200px|Even if you are "losing", it is important to learn how to lose with grace and dignity.]]
Every Wikipedian needs to know '''how to lose''' with a semblance of grace and dignity.

We like to think of the Wikipedia community as being infallible, but in the short term, mistakes are often made: A tangent derails a discussion for a much-needed clarification of policy; the community fails to show up and defend itself against poorly conceived plans; an editor's strong reputation or an early knee-jerk reaction prevents a clear analysis of a proposal; an advice page recommends an action well-suited to one problem, while inadvertently creating serious problems in other situations; or emotions run high during editing of a controversial article, and an [[edit war]] breaks out.

When you are on the losing end of an argument, remember these things:
* [[Wikipedia:Let it go|'''Let it go''']]—for now, at least. So what if your ideal improvement can't be made today? If your idea is a good one, it will still be a good idea next year.
* '''Failure isn't the end of the world.''' Failure is unpleasant, but there are still {{NUMBEROFARTICLES}} articles out there, and 99% of them need to be improved.
* '''Recognize when ''no'' means ''no''.''' Your idea of what Wikipedia should be or do may be completely different from what the community believes. Sometimes "no" means "I don't understand", but more often, it means [[Wikipedia:Get over it|"we understand, and the answer is still no."]] If you're in the minority, recognize and remember this fact. [[Wikipedia:Drop the stick and back slowly away from the horse carcass|Don't continue to press for your desires against clearly expressed community-wide consensus]]. Doing so will just make yourself look like a child who thinks, "No, you may not have a cookie" means "I must not have yelled 'COOKIE!' loud enough for my parents to hear me."
* '''Act like an adult.''' Don't get mad, [[Wikipedia:Don't throw your toys out of the pram|throw your toys out of the pram]], [http://www.usemod.com/cgi-bin/mb.pl?GoodBye write a resignation manifesto]. <s>Living</s> Editing well is the best revenge. Go do some good work in an undisputed area.
* '''Remember that it may not be important.''' When [[WP:Nobody cares|nobody cares]], that's a sign that your issue isn't that important to the community. Advice pages need to focus on real problems without providing [[WP:CREEP|endless instruction on avoiding hypothetical problems]]. The change that seems critical to you might seem trivial to others. And even if it seems critical ''now'', [[Wikipedia:The world will not end tomorrow|it probably isn't the end of the world]], and you may look back on it in a couple of weeks wondering what all the fuss was about.

==Tips and tricks==
* Stick to real, current, practical problems. There might be an ideal solution to a hypothetical problem, but [[WP:Nobody cares|sometimes, nobody may be interested]]. In discussions, give simple, concrete examples.
* [[WP:Too long; didn't read|TL;DR]] is the law of the internet. If a discussion gets too long, ''everyone'' loses. Keep your responses brief, and stick to the main point. Avoid the [[WP:Chunk o' text defense|"chunk of text" defense]].
* Silently limit yourself to one or two comments a day on a particular page. You've got to give other editors a chance to participate and to [http://meatballwiki.org/wiki/DefendEachOther defend you and your idea]. Work on one of those {{NUMBEROFARTICLES}} articles instead of endlessly refreshing the page so you can pounce on any reply. By doing this, you force your opponents to slow down, too, and perhaps they'll use the extra time to think more deeply about the issue.
* If you're feeling stressed by the dispute, [[Wikipedia:Wikibreak|take a break]]. [[WP:Wikipedia is not that important|Wikipedia is not that important]], and it will be here tomorrow. Who cares what the page says for the next 24 hours? Plan something fun to do, catch up on your real life, and come back tomorrow, or next week.
* A variant of the above approach is to pick an article in an entirely different section or part of the project to work on. If disputes over a music article are stressing you out, try editing a history article or a geographic article; after all, on the English Wikipedia, there are almost five million articles to work on. Alternatively, try editing a different part of the project, such as user essays. Or find a [[WP:SISTER|different project]] to work on. The article on your hometown or favorite vacation spot probably needs some help at [[voy:Wikivoyage:Welcome, Wikipedians|Wikivoyage]]. Wikisource's [[s:Wikisource:Proofread of the Month|Wikisource:Proofread of the Month]] group is friendly and helpful to new folks. Add photos to articles at non-English Wikipedias. Give it a try.
* Copy the article that is in dispute and paste it into your Sandbox on your user page. Then you can make all the text and source changes that others are against you making, and make the article "perfect," at least from your point of view.

==See also==
* [[Wikipedia:Perennial proposals]]
* [[Meta:How to win an argument]]
* [[Wikipedia:Get over it]]
* [[Wikipedia:The Most Important Thing Possible]]
* [[Wikipedia:Wrongful consensus]]
* [[Wikipedia:Wikipedia is not about winning]]

{{Wikipedia essays|civility}}

[[Category:Wikipedia essays about consensus]]

Wikipedia:How to lose - Revision history

Tachyony: Imported page